IS POLYGAMY IDEAL?

 

YoungMan (1)Polygamy is the condition or practice of having more than one spouse at one time. This means that in polygamy, one is legally married to more than one person at the same time.

Is Polygamy wrong? Let’s find out…

From Christ’s teaching in Matt. 19:3–6, it can be seen that monogamy is God’s ideal for marriage In the passage stated above, He cited the creation account in Gen. 1:27 and 2:24, saying ‘the two will become one flesh’ not more than two.

We can therefore establish that God’s original intention at creation was monogamy as the right system of marriage; this can further be buttressed with the fact that under God, Adam married only one wife, Eve.

THE NEW TESTAMENT & MONOGAMY

  1. In Matt. 19:4, we are told by Jesus that God created ‘one male and one female’ and joined them in marriage.  Mark 10:6-8 (ESV): “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh”

The ‘two as one’ is the pattern on how marriage was to be conducted from the start, NOT three or four.

God took Eve from Adam’s ribs and gave her back to him as his wife (singular) showing God’s approval of what the marriage union is to be like. God always spoke of man’s “wife,” as singular, not in plural form.

  1. The New Testament teaches that, “Each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.” (1 Cor. 7:2). Monogamous marriage clearly depicts the type of relation Christ has with His bride, the church.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. (Eph. 5:31-32).

The church is called the bride; collectively as one (singular) each person is not a bride, as in plurality of spouses and marriages.

  1. Monogamy was the type of marriage that was acceptable for anyone that wanted to become a church leader in the New Testament.

Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money.

He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, For if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church?” 1Timothy 3:2-5 (ESV)

Let deacons each be the husband of one wife, managing their children and their own households well – 1Timothy. 3:12 (ESV)

This means that no one who is married to more than one person can be involved in church leadership, because the leaders must set the example for the rest of the church and as much as possible reflect God’s intention for what the Christian family should be like.

This verse could also imply that there were people in the church who could have been church leaders but because they were married to more than one person, they were part of the church fellowship, but restricted from becoming church leaders.

Polygamy is wrong, it is not and will never be God’s plan for marriage.

I’M  NOW A CHRISTIAN YET A POLYGAMIST, WHAT CAN I DO?

Polygamy is sin. Like every other sin, we must confess it to God and repent from it. However, unlike other sins where repentance will mean leaving your old way of life behind, repentance in this situation will be different.what-is-a-peaceful-divorce

If you’re a Christian and a polygamist, you might say that a way out of this situation is to divorce the extra spouses until there’s just one left 🙂

Here’s what I think, It’s not the right way to deal with it! Divorce is also against God’s plan for marriage; it’s a sin and then committing one sin can’t cancel-out another sin, the same way a sinful divorce cannot correct a sinful second or third marriage. Rather, take Paul’s advice in 1 Corinthians 7:20(ESV): “Each one should remain in the condition in which he was called”.

As a Christian, if you are already married to more than one spouse, then you should stay married to all your spouses and seek to live as best as you can to honour God and perform your responsibilities to your family. For instance according to James 2:1, you shouldn’t show partiality to one spouse over another.

An argument can be put forward that since being married to more than one spouse at the same time isn’t biblically right, then one can divorce a spouse to marry another, hence being married to just one spouse. Well it’s still wrong, remember – Jesus is against divorce (Matt. 19:3-9) 🙂

My advice;Don’t pass it down!

Let the polygamy end with you; don’t pass on the idea to your children.  Teach them the way of the Bible, monogamy. When you do, you will need to explain to them carefully because they would see a contradiction based on the fact that you’re a polygamist. Tell them you were wrong for being a polygamist, let them know your mistake and encourage them not to make same. By doing this, you can demonstrate true repentance, being used by God to help them and even others make good decisions with respect to the right type of marriage.

I want to remind you that whether you’re a polygamist or not, irrespective of whom you are, God’s love for you is unconditional. Rest assured of HIS undying love.

 

 

Please feel free to share and comment on this post in the comment form below. Thanks

 

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Comments

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Ozioma Michaels

Mike is passionate about helping people know the truth, understand why they should believe and practice it in all areas of their personal lives; thereby living out their faith in Christ. His favourite word is ‘conviction’

Comments ( 5 )
  1. Tosin Marvellous
    July 31, 2015 at 11:36 am
    Reply

    Polygamy is totally out of it for any child of God. It is a sin and no one should venture into it at all. and for those that are in it, let them seek for spiritual counsel and do restitution. No sinner will go unpunished.
    Thanks for the write up, the unmarried need to know this and watch out before going into marriage.

    • Michael Uegbu
      July 31, 2015 at 2:43 pm
      Reply

      Thanks for your comment Tosin,
      Such wise counsel, God bless you.

  2. rose khemmy
    August 2, 2015 at 5:03 pm
    Reply

    Nice words****to me I don’t see polygamy as a sin becos moses,David nd Abraham had more than one wife,so having more than one wife wz not stated in d bible…so we can’t just assume it’s a sin*God stated that so that we won’t venture into sin that means a man must leave his household n cling too his wife…been polygamous doesn’t make u a sinner..as far as u r obeying n following our Lord’s doctrine,what I feel is been polygamous is ones decision n choice ***

  3. rose khemmy
    August 2, 2015 at 5:06 pm
    Reply

    @Michael can u pls tell me which of d bible Verse that stated Polygamy as a sin***

    • Michael Ukegbu
      August 10, 2015 at 10:09 am
      Reply

      Rose, thanks for your comment.
      Sin is simply going against God’s ordinance, or will or plan or intention.
      Here’s the thing, in this article, I established God’s original intention for marriage from the bible (Gen. 1:27 and 2:24), and then went on to show more facts from the new testament that complement God’s initial plan as seen in the old testament. So we can agree that monogamy was God’s original intention, then anything outside that can be termed as sin (going against God’s intention or purpose) and I think the word sin is not too heavy to be used here. Moreover I stated here that God loves you irrespective of your sin (Rom. 5:8), hence if a man is a polygamist and later becomes saved, then God’s grace can prevail. For instance, if you offend someone and later apologise, the fact that your apology was accepted and you’re forgiven doesn’t now make your wrong actions right.
      At this point I must state here that even though Abraham had Hagar, that doesn’t make it the right practice and it also doesn’t mean it is right to marry more than one wife. Remember God promised Abraham a seed and Sarah wanted Abraham to have a child through her maid, but in all, God’s promise came through and it came through the lineage God had initially ordained.
      David was called a man after God’s heart, yet he sinned by killing Uriah and taking Bathsheba as his wife, this was a sin he had to pay for. (2 Samuel 12:7-14) Also Read 2 Samuel 11: 3-27; 12:1-14
      Here’s the thing, God wants monogamy, man can choose otherwise because man has freewill, and that by no means makes man’s choice the yardstick for what’s right or wrong. God’s word, which is infallible, is the best yardstick.
      Hope this answers your question Rose.

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